Ask Jimbo

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jimbo
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Re: Ask Jimbo

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sproughton wrote: Wed Jun 09, 2021 7:39 pm If I had to make a suit purely out of breakfast cereal, which cereal would be best for the job?

I'm thinking Shreddies.
Mini Bix would be good and if you mixed flavours have an "interesting" look. Once it has got wet however it will stick like S£&T and never break....so consider it as body armour
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Re: Ask Jimbo

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magicman wrote: Wed Jun 09, 2021 7:53 pm Here's a few i put in my questions for James O'Brien notes.

When does a badge become a brooch ?
Why does milk taste different when drank from a China cup or ceramic mug ?

Regards Steve
When it is not Military or emergency services

One should never drink from either... only from a glass... Crystal is best (Keep standards up man come on)
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Re: Ask Jimbo

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scooter wrote: Wed Jun 09, 2021 7:40 pm Can you explain the Big Bang Theory to me James please.

scooter
It's about silly Yanks making poor jokes with canned laughter.... I rarely laugh, and that girls voice wants me want to listen to nails being pulled down a blackboard
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Re: Ask Jimbo

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Kansas City Milkman wrote: Wed Jun 09, 2021 8:32 pm Hi Jimbo, my knee hurts a bit today. Why? TIA
Hop on the other until it is better. Or better still don't do what is causing it to hurt

Or Man up. Don't be a big girls blouse
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Re: Ask Jimbo

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Bungle-ator wrote: Wed Jun 09, 2021 8:39 pm Dear Jimbo,

If a 42 year old man drew the following picture (entitled Panicky Forest Fire) and suggested it be used as a mural instead of a tranquil beach scene would this suggest sociopathic tendencies?

Image

Ps. Mr Potato Head is not present in this picture. You'll find it's a much better resemblance of the dude from Munch's The Scream painting
No You are sane. Put it up for sale. Someone is likely to pay enough money for it to buy you a shed load of watches.

Keep it up
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Re: Ask Jimbo

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jimbo wrote: Thu Jun 10, 2021 10:38 am
scooter wrote: Wed Jun 09, 2021 7:40 pm Can you explain the Big Bang Theory to me James please.

scooter
It's about silly Yanks making poor jokes with canned laughter.... I rarely laugh, and that girls voice wants me want to listen to nails being pulled down a blackboard
Gotcha James.

Thanks.

scooter
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Re: Ask Jimbo

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Why do my cycling socks have an L on one and an R on the other even though they are exactly (and I mean exactly) the same?

Following on from that will I go slower if I put them on the wrong foot?

scooter
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Re: Ask Jimbo

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When I put on my boating socks, red for port, green for starboard. Why does everyone say I have them the wrong way round? They look right when I look at them!
Time keeps on slipping into the future
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Re: Ask Jimbo

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jimbo wrote: Thu Jun 10, 2021 10:28 am
Dickchins wrote: Wed Jun 09, 2021 6:46 pm Does my girlfriends bum look big in those jeans?

I get absolute grief however I answer this stupid question.
Tell her "Yes".... "it looks big in whatever you wear darling"

Then stand well clear

Solid advice. Ill let you know how long the wait is at Bolton a&e dept :thumbup:
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Re: Ask Jimbo

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jimbo wrote: Thu Jun 10, 2021 10:33 am
suicidal_orange wrote: Wed Jun 09, 2021 6:49 pm Perfect timing, I was thinking today that I need a new job. Given that my experience is in jobs I don't want (previously in an office and currently a CNC operator/setter) what do you suggest? I have brains and am physically strong/healthy, something that uses both would be great.
Start your own Fencing and gate business. You only need a van (flat bed) chain saw, level (1M), a couple of spades, and plenty of upper body strength. A good eye for a straight line helps. There is plenty of work out there
Nice, I'd never have thought of that!

Work is allegedly going to improve but I'll keep this suggestion in mind if it doesn't :thumbup:
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Re: Ask Jimbo

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Ian Mc wrote: Thu Jun 10, 2021 12:18 pm When I put on my boating socks, red for port, green for starboard. Why does everyone say I have them the wrong way round? They look right when I look at them!
One should always pass the port to the left, your landlubber friends will never "get it"

I suggest keel hauling them... no one likes smart arses
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Re: Ask Jimbo

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scooter wrote: Thu Jun 10, 2021 11:56 am Why do my cycling socks have an L on one and an R on the other even though they are exactly (and I mean exactly) the same?

Following on from that will I go slower if I put them on the wrong foot?

scooter
I teach driving for a living in my experience most don't have a clue about left and rights.... You may as well wear them inside out for the good it does. Or wear your other half's stockings, it would provide an eye full for motorists as they pass you.

Stay safe on the roads, don't drink and ride
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Re: Ask Jimbo

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Kansas City Milkman wrote: Wed Jun 09, 2021 8:40 pm I'm really glad you're here actually. I do have some nagging questions you'll be able to answer (inc previous q)
1) why does my knee hurt today?
2) who invented marzipan and why did they bother?
3) why are Coldplay and Ed Shearan on the radio (both leave me cold)
4) why do olives taste like earwax?

Tia
KCM
1. It doesn't it's your mind playing with you
2. Who ever it was should have been thrown into the Tiber with a rat and a monkey in a sack back in the Roman days
3. May I suggest listening to test match special where you will hear neither, The standard of cricket however will leave you frozen
4. Try not trying ear wax when you are sober, when drunk it tastes like nectar (ear wax that is) Olives taste vile whatever state of drunkenness you are in
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Re: Ask Jimbo

Post by Bungle-ator »

What a legend you are Jimbo. I genuinely thought you started this car crash of a thread so you could sit back and watch it burn. I salute you though as you're the real deal! :clap:
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Re: Ask Jimbo

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Olives taste vile whatever state of drunkenness you are in
Thank you Jimbo, I thought I was the only person who doesn't like Olives (nor marzipan come to that)!
I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left